If you have ever been stalked, you know: Some people are bat-shit crazy and you're on your own to cope with it

Image of a camera with a frowny face in the lens

September 2020, I moved into a new apartment in a nice, quiet neighborhood. I said hello to the female next door and she ignored me, looked the other way. Odd. Some weeks later I saw her again and said hello. This time she glared at me. She seemed hateful for whatever reason so I stopped making the effort to be civil. Anytime I saw her after that I looked past her like she was invisible and looked away when it was impossible to avoid walking past her.

Around spring or summer 2024 I received a piece of mail for her address, misdelivered by the mail carrier. Since I had not sifted through my mail at the box, I noticed I had her vehicle registration renewal notice mixed in with my mail as I walked up the stairs to my apartment. Well shit. I thought I would do the responsible thing despite her horrific attitude and give her mail to her. I knocked on her door. She opened the door and stared blankly at me without a word. I held out the notice and said it had been misdelivered to my mailbox. She snatched it out of my hand before the word ‘mailbox’ left my mouth and slammed the door in my face. I said ‘you’re welcome’ to the door.

February 2025, I noticed a ring camera had been installed on the door of the angry female’s apartment, aimed at my deck. On the rare occasion I went out to clear a path in the snow from my door to the stairs I heard the microphone on her camera engage and some odd noise uttered into the mic. I said out loud, partly to myself, “if you’re testing your mic it works.” It seemed that confirmation ended her curiosity. Until it didn’t.

Throughout the summer 2025, I would go outside to put my umbrella up to block the sun from heating my apartment to 85 degrees by 0700. The angry female repeatedly keyed her mic and made noises at me. I told her camera to get its eyes off me. At other times I said shut the fuck up. And at others I resorted to sign language. You can guess which finger. Why the interest in escalating the harassing and stalking aided by her camera aimed at my deck after her unilateral mic-check during the winter? Her drug addiction, maybe?

During this record-setting hot summer, the stench of pot smoke and cigarette smoke coming from the angry female’s apartment had become a regular nuisance and directly harming my health. The smoke was so heavy it permeated the entire south end of the building, lingered in the stairwell and on my deck, and entered my apartment through my window air conditioner and front door. I had raised the issue of smoke getting into my apartment many times with the manager, but he would not address it. Therefore, as of June 27^th, I started dropping complaints to the Colorado Department of Public Health and Environment citing the violation of the Clean Indoor Air Act. Although the law designated CDPHE responsible for implementation, they declined stating they did not have enforcement authority and told me to contact El Paso County Public Health. At the same time, I filed a complaint on the GoCOS app used by the City to manage public communication which ended up being assigned to CSPD; CSPD also told me to contact EPC Public Health. City Code designates enforcement of smoking regulations to EPC Public Health. I continued filing complaints with CDPHE, per state law, and began reporting the problem to EPC Health as well, per City Code. EPC also claimed they did not have enforcement authority. I filed 12 complaints between the end of June and the end of July with both CDPHE and EPC Public Health. Additionally, I used about 2 bottles of ZEP smoke odor eliminator to clean my air conditioner, twice, and deodorize the air outside my door during her day-long pot smoking sessions that contaminated my property and the air in the stairwell, my deck, and the storage space at the end of my deck.

On July 26^th I filed a maintenance request on AppFolio that manages the property citing the pot smoke coming from her apartment into my apartment. On the 29^th the manager finally took action, sort of. A notice was emailed to all residents clarifying the smoking restrictions overall and for each building. Building 901 was directed to stay 25 feet from any shared entryway and no smoking was allowed in the atrium. Building 855, where I live next to the pot smoker, was directed to not smoke near an open window where your smoke might go into another person’s unit and if smoking on the balcony ensure your smoke is not going toward another unit.

Well, you can guess correctly that the angry female lost her mind and began to harass me as I described above to include her throwing absolute toddler-style tantrums in the form of door slamming and pounding her fists the entire length of the shared wall from my living room to my bedroom. It is now October and she continues with the tirades. That is some bullshit. But I have my own camera now and I have a record of every door slam and fit she throws. I don’t go outside my door without an umbrella or a big hat or shopping bag to block my face. For some reason that really annoys her, too. Whatever.

It seems a waste of time, money, and resources to create state laws that no one will enforce, and local control effectively renders useless. I have encountered the same emphasis on process and lack of accountability in my job administering social safety net programs. Including immigrant status verification. The Social Security Administration can verify status which determines eligibility for assistance programs, each with its own, very different eligibility requirements. However, when they find a fraudulent document, SSN, or ID number it’s not like they’re going to go knock on that door or notify law enforcement. Lack of transparency, providing clear evidence, and failure in leadership have put us where we are. We need to start asking more questions, listen with intention, and ask more questions to understand what is going on. Especially when engaging elected officials and bureaucrats. Don’t believe everything you hear because you think this or that politician has your back. The only safe assumption in this chaos is to assume they don’t. Think critically. Ask questions. Search for the facts instead of repeating the easy political narratives. In the end, without accountability in government we are all living in hell.